One-Star Reviews for “A Day In The Life Of Marlon Bundo”


Last night, Last Week Tonight With John Oliver did a segment on Mike Pence. Much of it was not kind to the Vice President except when John Oliver complimented Pence on his cute pet bunny, Marlon Bundo.

Today, Pence’s family released a book called “Marlon Bundo’s Day in the Life of the Vice President”. Not to be outdone, John Oliver’s show released a book last night called “A Day In The LIfe Of Marlon Bundo”.

In Oliver’s book Marlon meets another boy bunny, and they fall in love and decide to get married. However, a stinky bug in power says they can’t get married, so the people unite and vote the bug out of office.

Oliver’s book is outselling Pence’s book, and it’s currently the best selling children’s book on Amazon. As of this writing, 97% of reviewers are giving it five out of five stars, and the other 3% are giving it one star. Here’s a sample of one-star ratings “A Day In The LIfe Of Marlon Bundo” has received:

The book can be purchased from Amazon or at All sales will benefit the LGBT advocacy organization The Trevor Project.


In college I wrote for The Paladin, the school’s weekly newspaper. One of the dumb things I contributed to the Arts & Entertainment section was horoscopes. Below are my contributions from my sophomore year.


You’re not going to be able to talk about this weekend without using the word “toilet” a lot.

On second thought, maybe the idea of a rapping homophobic version of the Village People was kind of silly after all.

You will feel both alienated and betrayed when you realize that your beloved teen center will not mature along with you.

The courts deny your request to change your name, forcing you to remain Steve Urkel for life.

Remember that trying to please everyone is impossible, except perhaps in the case of everyone just wanting you to stop singing showtunes at your desk.

Thanks to recent advances in the field of taxidermy, you will look as good in a hundred years as you do today.

I recently saw the E! True Hollywood Story on Herve Villechez, the midget from the television show Fantasy Island.  Did you know that in addition to being a talented actor, he was also a sculptor, poet and accomplished yachtsman?  Herve, us simple peons hardly knew ye…

You have blossomed following a period of unprecedented spiritual and emotional growth. Now, however, it is time for a lot of Twinkies, Ding-Dongs, and Pabst Blue Ribbon.

Just a reminder that God will return for you sometime in the near future.  Be sure to offer snacks.  He has been gone a long time, and I’m sure he’ll be hungry.  Be courteous.

OK, the week ahead will be trying, blah, blah, blah. You’ll feel rewarded for hard work, blah, blah, blah. You’ll feel some doubt but move on, blah, blah.

You will discover a new miracle weight-loss plan that will enable you to lose weight and get in shape. Then you won’t follow it.

Your college will inherit millions of dollars from a wealthy alumni.  Half of that money will be used to fill up the pond.  The other half will be used to fill it to the brim with swans.  However, this will be to your benefit since your full-time job will be to keep the animals in the water at all times.

Some people think Jeff Foxworthy is funny, but I think that he’s just plain offensive.

You will be mortified to realize that you misspelled the words “fiery,” “dynamite” and “vengeance” in your letter to George W. Bush.

You will be disappointed when no one is surprised to hear that you attended a science fiction convention.

Say, it sure has been a wonderfully warm winter this year.  If I had it my way, all winters would be this balmy.  Hooray for global warming!

When offered potato salad, decline politely, saying that you’d take some if you liked it, but you don’t. Unless you do like it. In that case, by all means, have some potato salad, you jerk.

Put it back. Don’t look at Aquarius like you don’t know what it’s talking about. Put it back. Now!

Don’t Even Reply

John Lindsay’s website was an amazing website. While I’m referring to it in the past tense, the site still exists, but it hasn’t been updated in nearly five years.

John Lindsay describes Don’t Even Reply as “a collection of e-mails I have sent to people who post classified ads. My goal is to mess with them, confuse them, and/or piss them off.” And, boy, did he accomplish that. Here are some examples:

Horse Farm


Racist Microwave Buyer

Christmas Dinner

High-Rise Fridge Delivery

Lindsay’s crowning achievement is “Disguised Weapons”, which is located here. I’ve also included it below in case the website goes offline.

The Best Show On WFMU – “The Gathering Of The Juggalos”

The Best Show On WFMU was a combination music, comedy, and call-in radio program that ran from 2000 thru 2013 on New Jersey’s free-form, independent radio station WFMU. Hosted by Tom Scharpling, it lived up to its billing of “three hours of mirth, music, and mayhem”. Tom would usually kick-off the show with songs ranging from Led Zeppelin’s “Achilles Last Stand” to modern acts like F*cked Up. After the music , Tom usually hosted comedians & musicians in-studio and took calls from listeners. Superchunk drummer Jon Wurster would frequently call the show as a variety of characters from the very fictional, very surreal New Jersey suburb of “Newbridge.” Frequent Wurster characters included “Philly Boy Roy” (an unflinching supporter of all things Philadelphia), “Timmy von Trimble” (a genetically modified, two-inch-tall racist), and “The Gorch” (a senior citizen from York, Pennsylvania, who claims that the character of The Fonz on the TV show Happy Days was based on him, without permission).

A year after The Best Show On WFMU exited the airwaves, the program returned as a streaming Internet show and can be heard every Tuesday from 9pm to midnight at

This bit from July 21st, 2009 is a classic from the old show. Tom & comedian Paul F. Tompkins discuss an ad promoting the upcoming Gathering Of The Juggalos, a multi-day festival hosted by Insane Clown Posse in middle of nowhere — Cave-In-Rock, Illinois. It’s the funniest 45 minutes in existence. Enjoy!